Episode 47, available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and YouTube


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Helen Fisher is an anthropologist, a professor, an author, and one of the world's experts on the science of love. During our conversation, Helen talks about her background interest in love, the role that love plays in human existence, the evolutionary purpose of love, the possibility of love to endure for many years, how the subconscious influences who we fall in love with, how to know if you aren't in love, and wisdom she would provide to improve one's probability for healthy romance and a compatible mate choice.

As Helen notes during our interview, 97% of mammals don't pair bond. Human's drive to love and be loved is one of the sweeter aspects of our animal natures. She has spent her career trying to understand what love is and how we can better understand it. And just two years ago - in her mid-70's - Helen married for the first time.

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Time Stamps:

(00:00) Introduction
(02:08) Interest in studying the subject of love
(06:38) Introducing the concept of love to the world
(07:42) Explaining romantic love biologically and emotionally
(12:21) The importance of finding a long-term partner for humans
(14:06) Understanding love maps and brain systems
(23:35) The support for millennials’ ‘slow love’
(29:16) Deciding to end a relationship
(39:18) Identifying great compatibility matches
(43:13) Mitigating the risks of neuroticism from torpedoing a relationship
(49:50) Attachment styles and compatibility
(56:06) Identifying the root cause of depression
(58:06) Why the opposite of love is indifference
(01:09:20) What makes you better in a relationship
(01:12:47) The role of marriage in human life
(01:16:50) Evolving thoughts on marriage

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